mistressofmuses | Writing Goals/Calendar: August 2025

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Writing Goals/Calendar: August 2025

This year has not been great for writing. That really started to get to me around the end of June/beginning of July, ending up moving from frustration to a sort of apathy regarding writing in general. I'd reached a point where I didn't really enjoy anything about the process: I wasn't having fun planning things, I wasn't inspired by any of the things I'd been trying to work on, the actual writing felt like a miserable grind, and I wasn't even struggling through enough to create anything that I was happy about in the end.

I trimmed back my expectations for what to do in July pretty significantly, hoping that maybe focusing on some media intake or other things would start to make me feel a bit better about writing in general, if this was primarily a case of burnout.

Mixed success!

The goals I'd set for myself in July were:

- Finish the current WIP's chapter
- Finish snowflake part 3 for the Worldhopping Fairytale Monstrosity fic
- Take a break until something else feels exciting

How that went:
- I didn't work on the WIP
- I didn't work on the snowflake outline
- I *did* mostly take a break

Tangent that I promise feels relevant: I basically never experience much of an effect from caffeine, though I drink it fairly frequently, whether as coffee or tea or as energy drinks. Despite rarely noticing an effect, I always *hope* it'll wake me up at work, and the primary effect it does have when I do notice it is a slight improvement in my ability to focus. (Common ADHD self-medication usage.)
I was solo at work one weekend day mid-month, and I bought myself an energy drink in the hopes of focusing better while on my own for a long stretch. For some reason, the caffeine actually hit me, and gave me a burst of energy and focus (bordering on anxiety, but not actually ever quite tipping over badly.) I immediately turned that focus toward the entirely wrong thing: the desire to plan out a bunch of potential writing under a pseudonym.

Not gonna lie, the focused enthusiasm was a pretty enjoyable experience. It's been a really long time!

While that caffeine-fueled excitement wore off pretty fast (and I really do not know why it happened in the first place), part of that core idea seems solid to me. Writing under a name that isn't actually connected to my own has some appeal. One of the many issues I've had is the inability to get out of my own way, or ultimately becoming paralyzed over thinking that something I'm writing feels a little too personally revealing, or a bit too catered to my id... Not having to tie that writing to me as a person might be a bit freeing, haha.

Unfortunately, the interest in doing that hasn't really made it to the "actually motivated to work on things" stage, beyond a couple short bursts. Time management is still a lot of it, as always. It just feels like there aren't enough hours in the day, and it's almost always the thing that's shuffled to the bottom of the priority list. We've been spending so much more time hiking and things this year, I don't really have time even on my days off. That's not a complaint - I'm delighted not to be wasting the summer weather - but it does mean that time isn't going toward other things. Perhaps once the weather turns?
As always, it is primarily the need to reprioritize things, or make peace with this not being the priority for me right now. It may be the latter: I don't want to do less on my days off, I don't want to cut back on the reading that I'm actually managing, I want to keep posting photos from the stuff we go do even though that's time-consuming too.
If it never gets to become a priority, it's never going to *happen*, and I of course always have the option to reshuffle what I want to be spending my time on, but for now... I want to try to fit it in, but we'll see how much time I can actually carve out for it.

Goals for August:
- get a sort of intro blurb done for the pseudonym
- do some prioritizing and assessment of ideas
- I swear, I've got to get that stupid outline done, this is just silly
- maybe the WIP chapter

We'll see how things go. I'm at least feeling more optimistic about the idea of writing as a whole concept this month, compared to last, haha.

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Sounds like the break did you good! And that there was productive brainstorming for what may help with avoiding some unhelpful behaviours... ah, to get out of one's own way!! Best of luck!!!

The break was definitely helpful. I hope that the brainstorming does end up helping... we'll see if I can propel it forward into anything! Thank you!

I'm at least feeling more optimistic about the idea of writing as a whole concept this month, compared to last, haha.

Not a bad place to land! *hugs* May the motivation start to follow.

Thank you! I really do hope the motivation follows, but for now I'm just glad to have tipped more towards optimism than the mire of pessimism, ha.

I am a big fan of having separate names. In addition to my 3 Ao3 accounts, I've also started to establish the name I will try to publish original works under on Bluesky. That was I have an account with history. Also, I am possible better at taking aesthetic #AmWriting pictures than actually writing.

Starting my first additional Ao3 psued was a game changes for me, writing wise.

If the weather is good and the air is clear, it's good to take advantage of it. You are very productive overall, even if recently time had been a pain in the butt.

Part of my plan is definitely to start accounts in a few places with the penname I finally liked the sound of. Whether I actually end up attempting to publish or not, I'd like to have accounts that have at least a bit of establishment and history to them.
Ha! I should at least try taking some aesthetic pictures! And making some moodboards, haha.

I tried one other time to sort of create an alternative account, but I didn't really end up using it, and in some places the attempt still just made it an alt to my main account, so it never truly felt all the way separate. I am hopeful it'll be a help. There are some things I want to write, but that I'm a bit afraid could be too personally revealing to want to share, haha.

Thank you. I do really appreciate that! It's frustrating to feel like I've been stuck for so long.

I enjoy setting up the account and it's probably motivating. Also, I wont be starting it all from scratch. Good stuff will come up if people look up my psued. (Also, if you stumble across that account you will 100% clock me even though I post there on a delay. My NYC #amwriting pics were posted weeks after I got back)

My Ao3 accounts are fully separate, different emails and also different color schemes so my brain knows intuitively which one it is.

It is nice to allow for accounts to have a bit of a more gentle start to them, rather than trying to start from scratch and build it up really immediately. And having that longer history is a good thing, too... and is something that can't be faked. (Haha, if I end up running across it, I'll be amused! "Hey, I know that guy!" Though I won't draw the connection if you prefer the separation!)

Yeah, the previous attempt at a different account had a separate email and an AO3 account, but was just a sideblog on tumblr, so it wasn't *really* all the way separate. I'm not burning that account or anything, but it just wasn't quite enough of the separation I was looking for, I think.
Making sure the color schemes are different is a good point - just being able to mentally separate them is definitely helpful.

If you come across me organically, it's fine. Having the account to work on a bit is nice because it gives me something to do when words aren't cooperating.

Yeah, having something else to do when the writing isn't happening is something else I think might be nice. Something that isn't the actual word-making, but isn't totally unrelated, either.

Yeah, and it's fun to play with the aesthetics of being a writer. Being a little aspiration and fun can be good

A little aspiration, as a treat!

I think I tried too hard to avoid that sort of thing for a while, to the point it really did sort of sap some of the fun out of things. Along with a bunch of other bad writing advice that I've struggled to unlearn, I remember a really harsh wave of basically "no fun allowed" attitudes when it came to daydreaming about success or "romanticizing" the writing process or identity of being a writer... when like... yeah, you've got to do the writing part eventually, too, but there's nothing wrong with having fun or enjoying the process and the vibe and the aesthetic of what you're doing!

If you aren't having fun at least some of the time, then why do it??

Yeah, I was in spaces that were intense about 'if you enjoy these vibes you are a poser'. But, the more I look at real author careers the more I see that's BS. Enjoying what you do and what you want to do, being into the fiddly bits of it, can help a lot with mindset. Yeah, sometimes purely aesthetic stuff goes viral, but that doesn't mean making tea to set the mood is bad.

That was exactly it. "Enjoying the aesthetics of writing means that you aren't *really* a writer. Romanticizing "pretty" or "cute" images of writing means you aren't serious about it. You can either like the so-called vibes or you can actually write, but you can't do both. You're a poser if you share a cute candle or cup of tea or notebook."

Sure, I've seen people who really do seem to *only* be into the aesthetic vibe, and don't actually want to do any real writing, but... there's also no real harm in that? Let them have a cute latte and a fancy notebook if they want??

I understand that, like you said, someone going viral for purely aesthetic stuff (or the aesthetic stuff becoming like, the popular conception of writing, as opposed to the actual writing) can be annoying or frustrating... but being a killjoy about people wanting to *enjoy the thing they are doing* really isn't terribly helpful.

People who do sports get into the culture and aesthetics for their mind set. It's so normal in other serious pursuits, to really lean in and enjoy things.

I mean, we've had some booktok BS with people pre-selling books based on their aesthetic and selling the story of them as a writer, but that's only been super recent. We just had a new one: Audra Winter. OMG is that is debacle. But like, deciding that none of us can have fun forever based on that is so drama-damaged.

Right? Leaning in to the aesthetics and romanticizing it I can see as being a genuinely good thing.

Oh yes - there are certainly bad aspects of selling an aesthetic with nothing propping it up. Scammers gonna scam. I don't think I've heard about Audra Winter! I know that there was a lot of attention on Britt Andrews recently, and a huge amount of kickstarter money that seems to have vanished with nary a book to show for it, but that's been brewing for a while.

But exactly: deciding that everything must be the equivalent of utilitarian gruel and plain white walls forever because fun is a sign of the devil... is also not the way, haha. Deeply drama-damaged.

The Audra Winter thing blew up recently because she made a big deal about having editors and made it sound like she was working with the developmental editor from The Hunger Games. Lots of deceptive wording. Dressed and did make up like she was trying to channel Elizabeth Holmes. Switched between 'omg so oppressed' pity marketing to bragging about making 6 figures off of pre-orders and hiring a whole team. Book just came out and it's a typo filled mess. There is a lot more, but mostly it's interesting how people fell for either the 'oppressed prodigy' routine or the 'entrepreneur with all the tools to launch the next big thing' and had no questions when she switched modes.

It's all very 'okay, y'all got scammed, but why did these tactics work on you?' I don't know if she meant to scam or just got caught up in her own bullshit.

I think I caught a faint whiff of that drama, because the "developmental editor from the Hunger Games" thing sounds like something I heard about. But yikes on the "I'm such an oppressed underdog" <-> "I'm making 6 figures on this" thing. That sounds exactly like every big MLM influencer ("I'm just a stay-at-home mom, small business owner, trying to make it in a tough world..." "Also I'm a total boss babe and I make hundreds of thousands of dollars for just a few hours work!"), just successfully ported to grift on a book. Wonder if she planned to pivot to selling thousands-of-dollar courses to "teach" others to do the same?

Perhaps she didn't intend it to be a grift... but that pattern sounds like someone doing it deliberately.

There are a lot of facets to the drama. You might have caught a few subtweets about it, like the 'been working on this since they were 12 was supposed to be a selling point' and 'don't tell indy authors they need editors' and more.

She certainly fits a pattern that we've seen lots of. Even her critics are trying to give her the benefit of the doubt and act like she accidentally stumbled into just what the tiktok algo wanted. But either this was a grift or she's just gotten so lost in the sauce of trying to be what gets the most likes online that she's in a scary place. Don't know which is worse. For her sake, I hope she's a grifter. The alternative is scary.

Her not doing the line edits she paid to have an editor suggest because she was so overwhelmed with running the business side of things and her saying that she has to keep doing this because 'being an author is her brand', yeah, not great.

Yeah, I think I definitely caught a few posts that were vagueing the situation, or were at least sort of referencing it, but just enough to guess that *something* had happened, but not enough detail to know what!

Honestly, I think you're right: it's a lot better if she's just a grifter, because it's a lot scarier if she stumbled onto this without trying to. But it really is the same sort of grifter pattern that crops up again and again... playing up the "underdog/disadvantaged/impoverished" angle when that plays better, and pivoting to "boss-babe/hustling/six figures/business owner" angle if that seems like it's going to get more respect/attention/buy-in.

But fucking wow on "being an author is my *brand*; I'm too busy for you to expect me to actually do any of the actual *writing*!" Astounding.

Yeah, there's a lot of red flags there.

Also scary that people were so into supporting her. I feel like people wanting in on the ground floor of the next big thing is part of it.

Ah, that's a good point. A lot of people really do want that experience of being "in" on the big shiny new thing from the start. Sort of a brand of FOMO, and looking forward to some sort of future bragging rights... Sounds like that was part of what she figured out a way to take advantage of.

Especially with collecting editions of books being such a huge thing, yeah, everyone wants that first edition. And yeah, that probably helped since she kind of abused the tiktokshop in a way that people couldn't leave reviews there or ask for refunds. (Preordering got you a bookmark, and getting that boomark technically filled the order. You can't leave a review too long after getting an order, so everything was marked fulfilled and no reviews based on the book could be posted)

Ah yes! I kind of forget that the whole collecting different editions of things is such a thing. I feel like I sort of missed that coming back into vogue, though I shouldn't have! I know loot crate type subscriptions with special editions were and are very popular, and I know that several mainstream publishers have started pushing pricey special editions of some of their works. Multiple writers have had special editions of books that were exclusive to different retailers, including special art/covers/bonus content/etc. I saw two different authors I follow talking about sales of new books, and how soon the first edition was likely to sell out before it went to a second printing. (I didn't realize until after I had it that the red-edged first-edition of The Buffalo Hunter Hunter was desirable.)
So I knew *all of the above* and never really put together that "oh right, people collect these" haha. (I was so used to thinking of collecting being like... having the rare first edition of something that later became popular, not preemptively collecting, or getting different editions of something fairly current.)

But oh, that is such a shitty way to game the refund policy! There are people who do the same thing with "pre-sales" in the model hobby, though most people seem to have gotten wise to it. But yeah, having the "freebie" thing fulfill the order as far as the system is concerned is a really terrible way to take advantage of it!

I do not get the obsession with spredgies, or sprayed edges. I am glad I don't, because people spend a lot of money on them. On hardcovers it's particularly confusing to me because on paperbacks you can at least stack them so they show neatly, without the overhangs and visual busy-ness of the dustcover edges.

I think I have like... two books with sprayed edges. It is visually sort of neat, and I don't dislike it... but I also didn't pay extra for them, that was just how they came, haha. I'm SO glad that isn't something that I feel the need to try and acquire!

I'm genuinely glad it sounds like the break has helped, especially with what does seem like a degree of burnout. It's awesome you've had a burst of inspiration and I really hope that the pseudonym helps you massively unstuckify things in your writing! (The paradoxical caffeine effects thing is totally an ADHD phenomena from what I've heard from many with ADHD. I'm glad it helped with creating an alternative solution to writing what you really want to without the pressure of it being under your main account.) Sending good vibes and luck for motivation and for things to continue in a positive, writing becomes fun and enjoyable again direction!!!

I'm glad, too! It's always so hard to know whether pushing through or backing off is the right call when struggling... so I'm glad it seems like this time I made the right choice.

Fingers crossed that the pseudonym helps. I think that degree of separation might!

The different reaction to caffeine does seem to be fairly common with ADHD! The brain does weird stuff.

Appreciate the good vibes, and hoping to keep things going!

I love the idea of using a pseudonym! It takes the pressure off to be or present something a certain way.

Also, I hear you on having too many things to do on days off, or just in general. It's a constant push and pull to prioritize. I guess that's just being an adult? Ugh.

Yeah, I really hope the pseudonym thing removes a lot of pressure. I think it'll be nice not to have to worry about random people I know getting judgey about what I write, haha.

Being an adult sucks, lol! It is really rough to have to prioritize all the different things that need doing, the balance between making the most of my time "off," but also needing to do like... life management stuff and take care of responsibilities, etc. Never enough time!

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Writing Goals/Calendar: August 2025

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